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| Written by Dr. John E. Russell Sr |
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Ode to allergies To the tune of Pollen, on a high and windy hill, The golden rod is Hay Fever is a very "funny" thing. (You may think it's funny, but it's not). (Dredicated to all allergy-sufferers.) BAWL GAME To the tune of "Take Me Out to the Ball Game": Bawl me out to the take game, Bawl me out to the crowd, Buy me some nutpe and jackercracks. I don't bare if I ever get crack. Then it's hoot, hoot, hoot for the rome team. Though I adshame its a mitt, For it's one, two, free trikes You're out! Of the old gall bame! SONGS THAT NEVER MADE IT THE FLY SONG When you and I were young maggots, dear. THE PARATROOPER'S LAMENT A little-bitty tear* lemme down, Spoiled my act on the ground. I'm so happy I could frown 'cause a little bitty tear lemme down. *[pronounced tare] DACHSHUND COMMERCIAL Get a long, little doggie, Get along.... HOME ON THE RANGE Overheard recently on the range: A deer said to an antelope, "Shh, I think I just heard a discouraging word." PC RAP Spock, Spock, the baby doc, leads a peace march 'round the block. Around him everywhere you look, are kids he messed-up with his book! (Mad Magazine) BOLL WEEVIL RAP Th' fust time I seen the boll weevil it wuh kindly rare. Th' next time I seen the boll weevil he had alla his family there! He's jus' lookin' fo a home. Jus' lookin fo a home. We wuh jus' sittin' aroun' havin' a friendly chat. When I found dat doggone bug done made hisself a home in my bran' new Sunday hat! He's jus' lookin' fo a home. Jus' lookin fo a home. So, the farmer take duh weevil and he sets him on a cake ah ice. "My!" said the weevil to th' farmer "It's mighty cool and nice" "Hit'll be my home." "Hit'll be my home!" So, the farmer take the weevil and he throws him in the red-hot fire. "My!" said the weevil to th' farmer "Hit's kindly warm in hyar!" "But, hit'll be my home "Hit'll be my home!" Now, if enybody ax you who wrote dis song tell 'em wuh a light-complected fella wit a paira blue duffies on. He's looking fer a home. He's looking fer a home. HIT HAIN'T AGONNA RAIN NO MORE Frog a-sittin' on a lilly pad gazin' in th sky. Lilly pad broke frog fell in got water all in his eye. Oh, it hain't agonna rain no more Oh, it hain't agonna rain no more. How in the heck can I wh m' neck when it hain't agonna rain no more? <From my ebook, They All Laughed At Me When I Said That I Was Going to Write A Joke Book. Download this book free at http://BusterSoft.com/JRCM. |
| Last Updated on Thursday, 25 August 2016 17:58 |